I’ve been looking back at some old photos this week and getting a bit thoughtful. This photo was taken at Reading festival in 2012 and I look so different! (or at least, I think I do!)
Anyway, it got me to thinking – you know that bit in The Notebook where Rachel McAdams turns to her fiancé (the one that’s not-Ryan-Gosling) and she says ‘I never paint anymore, I used to paint!’ and he’s like ‘you can paint, let’s get you some paint’. But it’s not really about the paint – you know? Poor old not-Ryan-Gosling never really stood a chance, but that moment always struck me as the end of any chance he might have had.
While this story is a great excuse to include a gif of Ryan Gosling (you can thank me later), it’s also a fantastic metaphor for how I’ve felt this past month. I used to write! (it might help you to imagine I’m saying this in Rachel McAdams’ voice) I used to write all the time and I never write anymore! When I was about eleven or twelve years old, I filled a big fat notebook full of a very rambling story about Robin Hood (at the time I was obsessed with the TV series), starring, of course, yours truly as Robin’s brave and indispensable sidekick (ha!). I honestly wrote in that thing at every waking moment and I ended up basically writing a short novel. It was pretty impressive, and also involved me spending a huge amount of time alone in my bedroom and may have been the reason why I had no friends (I’m just kidding!).
The point is, this month I decided to write again. I didn’t exactly shut myself in my bedroom like the good old days, but let’s just say that I have twenty five thousand words of a short story, and, well, I’m still working on my one thousand word essay that’s due on Wednesday. It’s not going to win the Booker Prize but it feels so good to write again!
Anyway, while we’re on the subject, (are you ready with your best Rachel McAdams impressions?) I used to read! I used to read all the time and I don’t read anymore! Nowadays I read all the time for my course but I do find myself speed reading through the huge amount of material, and I honestly can’t remember the last time I read for pleasure. I used to read books and be so excited about them – I remember reading Salinger for the first time, or Burgess (particularly M/F), and those books absolutely blew my tiny mind. I’ve got a huge stack of books on my desk and I can’t wait to finish my course this week so I can get started. It’s going to be great! I might even start a mini series of book reviews to share the books that I’m excited about – what do you think?
Thanks for indulging me while I work through my creative rut! I haven’t had a lot to say recently but I’m still here!
I hope the Ryan Gosling gifs make up for a multitude of short-fallings.